Middle Earth Residential News Services: The
Classifieds
eShiremony...Let's Get Personal!
We've got a
match for you at
eShiremony
|
We help you find your soul mate...
or at least a Middle Earth hunting partner
who won't
stand you up in LOTRO,
no matter how
unsightly your armor or
how vicious
and vehement your parry, thrust and attacks are!
|
At
eShiremony,
you learn
about your needs and characteristics
before
learning about your perfect matches.
Fill out our
survey, see your results
and before you
can get a PUG all together in one place**,
we'll have
suggested matches for you!
Join us today!
We have
monthly subscriptions,
as well as
lifetime subs for those of you
who know you'll
be needing our services
again and again
throughout the years in LOTRO.
Testimonials from our clients...
| Eldo Swatmidge of Staddle: "I had my
eye on her ever since we became neighbors. I knew she was meant for
me, but it took a lot of help from others performing tasks I
assigned them and eShiremony to finally convince
Asphodel to be mine! She was worth the trip to the eShire...even
there and back again!" |
| "Anonymous" Hobbit Burglar:
"I didn't just meet just one of my wives there. I met all 4 of them
through eShiremony! I'm proposing tomorrow night to number
five! If she says yes, all six of us will be honeymooning in Carn
Dum." |
| Asphodel Froghorn of Staddle: "I
still think Eldo paid eShiremony extra for the results saying
we're perfect for each other. However, he just wouldn't let up and I
was tired of the spam eShiremony sent since Eldo had gotten
me added to their mailing list, so...I joined and gave in. You know,
maybe there's something to this stuff after all."
"Eldo's not so bad...for a farmer. I just wasn't sure I wanted to
be a farmer and marry one, too. Now, I couldn't live without him.
He's not all that much to look at, but he's such a sweet man at
heart!" |
| Sara
"Danger-Danger" Oakheart: "Before I came to
eShiremony, I was a wreck. I was always drawn to bad guys and
getting into the kind of trouble I couldn't get out of alone, and
sometimes, not even with the help of others. Now, I'm on the mend.
Thanks to eShiremony, I've met a wonderful man who's helping
me find religion and helping me learn to love myself without feeling the need
to throw myself at every dark, dangerous brigand or goblin I see
approaching me. I'm also in counseling and have been finally taken
off of suicide watch." |
| "Anonymous" Female Captain of Rivendell:
"Before I came to eShiremony, I had a hard time meeting men
who weren't afraid of a strong, commanding female presence. Now,
there are so many around, I have to scare them off with a battle cry
when I want some time alone with my errant herald. Thanks,
eShiremony. You finally showed me what real men look like. If
not for you, I'd still be thinking my herald was one." |
|
Make it
personal at...
eShiremony
We've got a
soul mate hunting partner for you!
|
Stop at the
nearest eShire area tavern or inn
and you just
might run into one of our
matchmaking
professionals!
If you don't
find us there,
just ask a
Nosey Hobbit about us!
Earnote: ...provided that members of the PUG are on
opposite ends of Middle Earth, are unable to take swift horse routes,
cannot use reflecting pools to reach set location and that there is no
captain in the PUG readily available or able to summon others to the quest
or instance location.
Back to
Personidex
| Want more off-beat
gaming humor from The LotrOnyx Files?
Click here!
|
|
Lick an Ear: Onyx's Guide to
Insanity . . . .
enhancing verbal neurons
the natural way!
. All
Rights
Reserved.
Legal Disclaimer & Terms of Use