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My LOTROniac Sign is Burglar!

Burglar...the Dragonsbreath Pipe-weed

 

Your symbol: Dragonsbreath Pipe-weed

 

In a smoky haze of mystery and illusion, you are both intriguing yet sinister.

Thief! Liar! Blasphemer! Con artist! Trickster!

All are adjectives defining the LOTROniac Sign known as the Burglar. And proud of that sneaky, deceitful, conniving behavior and reputation you Burglars are! The more insulting the words said of you, the more you smile dangerously with a mischievous gleam in your eyes and something up your sleeve that probably resembles an evil plan!

Ever since you were young, you've loved darkness and shadows, or more specifically...loved being camouflaged in darkness and sneaking unnoticed in shadows. As a child playing hide and seek, you were always the last to be found, often having to give yourself up before anyone was even close to discovering you on their own.

In addition to that child's game, you were always fascinated by magic tricks, sleight of hand and riddles that baffled most everyone else. You were never satisfied just being in the audience. You were determined to learn every trick and solve every riddle. For the most part, you succeeded, though there are still some mysteries even you have yet to solve. There's no one more conniving, confusing and tricky than you......except for maybe a few other Burglars.

In addition to your highly inquisitive and agile mind, you have a more keen sixth sense than most.** Due to that heightened sixth sense, in addition to wily debuff capabilities and a wide array of other sneaky skills, Burglars are a welcome addition to almost any fellowship.

Rarely, does the Burglar have problems making friends or joining fellowships, especially with a Burglar's uncanny ability to create opportunities for conjunctions or "fellowship maneuvers"! This can be especially handy when a Burglar wishes to "make the moves" on his/her date, but is shy and uncomfortable. That shyness and discomfort is easily overcome by invoking an "exploit opening." Before your date realizes what happened, your arm will be around his/her shoulders and your lips already kissing his/hers! When used in this way, "exploit opening" will probably have you seeing visions of a swooning heart before you, so use this skill with caution - especially if it is not love you're really after!

There are, of course, other more sinister and destructive uses for the "exploit opening," but you'll discover all that in due time as you mature into a healthy old age. Suffice to say, this skill in itself is often the reason why many invite Burglars into their fellowships and circles of friends --- despite all of your underhanded tricks and mind games!

Speaking of trickery, a Burglar's surprise attacks and abilities to remain hidden or stealthed make for a worthy opponent others should never turn their backs on...unless they are masochists, enjoying the twist of a knife in their backs! For these reasons, Burglars work best solo, rather than in stressful, highly competitive office environments.

Pity the fool who ends up competing with any Burglar for that executive office position or partnership! With your expertise in dirty, underhanded tricks, as well as your ability to reveal weaknesses and vulnerabilities in your foes, it's hard for you not to come out on top in that situation, no matter how dirty you have to play in order to succeed!

Just remember, proper etiquette in the company of others --- at least when they're looking --- is...not to steal. (That is, unless it's a stick of lipstick, a candy bar or a trashy magazine you're stealing...and you happen to be with a group of teenage girls at the time.) It may be difficult to stave off your desire to steal, but it's best if there are no witnesses to your most obvious crimes...unless those witnesses are orcs, brigands, goblins or trolls. Who would believe them, anyway?!

All that said, it's not surprising to note that Burglars often have difficulty in their personal relations. Knowing how you are and how you handle matters, makes you all the more pre-disposed to suspicion and conspiracy theorizing of those closest to you. Relax! Most other LOTROniac Signs are quite amiable and agreeable...well, at least off the battlefield they are! Just try not to be insulted when they frisk you for weaponry before they invite you to join them for coffee or cocktails.

Finally, when it comes to hobbies, you have many diverse interests in which you may prosper and enjoy. However, you are well suited as weaponsmiths, since this allows the craftiest of Burglars to not only make your own stun dusts and caltrops, but also marbles...which aren't just for "losing" or playing games anymore!

 

Burglar Strengths:

Heightened Sixth Sense

 

Sneak Attacks

 

Ability to Blend in with Surroundings

 

Strong Ability to Keep Secrets

Burglar Weaknesses:

Trustworthiness / Trust in Others

 

Honor

 

Reputation

 

Objects, Jewels, Silver, Gold and One Special Ring in Particular

 

Virtues of the Burglar:

Though there seems to be much variance amongst Burglars, there are some standard virtues most seem to have fine-tuned. Wisdom, Determination, Loyalty and Valour are the most commonly shared and valued of the virtues or traits.

Some Burglars are also known for their Fidelity, Empathy, Mercy, Patience, Idealism and Tolerance. And if you can believe it, still others are known for Charity, (self) Discipline and Justice, despite their bad habits of treachery, trickery and "sticky fingers"!

 

Primary health concerns of Burglars:

Provided you are not caught stealing too often and aren't caught sneaking around in places one should never go it solo, there is a great chance that you will live a long, prosperous life filled with many daring and exciting adventures. Of course, in your lifespan, you will experience many mini-deaths along the way, but that is to be expected when you hang out in the places that you Burglars do!

 

The primary health concern for any Burglar is not your physical self, but your mental well-being --- your mind. You need to have a clear and focused mind in order to be as deceitful, mysterious and sneaky as you are.

 

Do not take your mental health for granted. Feed your mind. Do crossword puzzles, riddles and word searches to keep your mind "fresh" and active. Take vitamin and mineral supplements that aid in alertness and concentration, as well as offer a boost to your mental clarity and memory.

 

If, for any reason, you suspect you may be exhibiting early symptoms or signs of Alzheimer's Disease, consult your physician immediately. After all, you wouldn't want to find yourself one day suddenly unstealthed, surrounded by a group of angered elites --- in a state of mass confusion that has you so panicked you can't even move...even though none of those elites actually stunned you...yet!

 

Occupations that Burglars excel at include:

Security Tester / Hacker

 

P.I. / Undercover Agent

 

Gossip Columnist

 

Assassin / Sniper

Robber / Thief

Telemarketer

Sales (pre-owned cars and places with "skinny mirrors")

Professional Athlete

Spy / Intelligence Work

Mafia / Mob Boss

Brigand / Blackwold

Lawyer

Tax Collector

Smuggler / Pirate

Nazgul

 

 

The "famed" who exhibit Burglar characteristics include:

Johnnie Cochran

Bonnie and Clyde

Scooby Doo Gang

James Bond "007"

Captain Jack Sparrow

Liz Smith (columnist)

Shaun Alexander (Running Back)

Brett Favre (Quarterback)

 

Robin Hood

 

Al Capone

Tony Soprano

Sonny Corinthos (of General Hospital)

Alan Dershowitz

 

 

Compatability:

Burglars do well when pairing with each other, as they have many things in common, including thievery...which may be frowned upon in general by other LOTROniac Signs. Hunters and Captains are also likely to find their hearts in the hands of a capable Burglar, who may actually be more tender and attentive to them and with them than most would suspect of one known for sneaky thievery.

 

Champions are the most incompatible match for Burglars, due to their opposite natures. Champions feel they achieve their means in a much more worthy, noble and honorable fashion than Burglars who resort to hiding, sneaking and stealing.

 

 

Gemstone: Lapus Lazuli

Flower/Plant: Orange Mock

Color: Black

Oil/Essence: Bay Leaf

 

 

 

**Earnote: Hunters being the only other sign or class to claim any serious extent of natural attunement to their extra-sensory perceptions.

 

 

 

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