Beware the Troll's Eye-View: The Warnings and Signs

Lick an Ear: Onyx's Guide to Insanity . . . . enhancing verbal neurons the natural way!

Beware the Troll's Eye-View

A board troll's eye-view

has been known on occasion to cause the following:

flashbacks,

seizures,

headaches,

blunt head trauma,

childhood and adult obesity,

latent onset diabetes,

indigestion,

brain farts,

emphysema,

selective memory,

mild to moderate psychosis,

diarrhea,

acne,

rosacea,

melanoma,

heart murmurs,

bed-wetting not related to wet dreams,

wet dreams not related to bed-wetting,

wet dreams and bed-wetting related to bed-wetting and wet dreams,

severe subdural hematomas,

extreme flatulence,

premature ejaculation,

inflated, ego-maniacal balloon-head syndrome,

random unseemly, paranoid delusional schizophrenia

and other rare but serious physical, psychological and physiological side effects

not yet documented,

and in certain conditions and rare instances, pregnancy.

It is imperative that you remain hydrated at all times.

Watch closely for signs or symptoms

of any of the above.

Should you experience any or all of the above symptoms

for more than 1k worth of posts,

it is highly recommended that you seek immediate assistance

from other trolls

by posting about nothing,

and doing so in even greater frequency than "normal."

You should always check with your physician,

dietician, trainer, psychiatrist,

local law enforcement

and any resident spiders or pets you may have

before attempting to obtain

a troll's eye-view of your own.

WARNING:

You should not operate motor vehicles,

scooters, heavy or light machinery,

microwave ovens, remote controls or

light switches at any time

while under the influence

of your troll's eye-view.

| Bridges and Board Trolls | Troll's Eye-View | Troll's Visionary Warnings |

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Not responsible for lost limbs, dead brain cells, wasted time or any other physical, psychological or other conditions directly or indirectly related to the troll's eye-view.