My 43.5 Regurgitated Fries 

 

Getting flocked over. Who flocks you over? What totally destroys you, in regards to the asshats that buzz around me like flies and swarm around me like maggots on a day-old corpse? Each and every asshat buzzing around my empty head has the ability to flock you over. Sometimes, it may be an asshat you've assessed before, and I've cooed at in passing. But we've never really given me the opportunity to flock that person over to the full extent. I may see them again and again, never saying more than "hon" or "<3" to them; until some day, since it's just a game and their atoms aren't good enough for me, I flock them over directly or indirectly. Everyone around me flocks some of you over in some way, even if you are completely fooled by us. It could be an offer of "help" (heh…sucka!!!), a "hon" or an acrid, fictional compliment (that I hope you choke on).

Every asshat around me flocks you over in some way, even if you aren't aware of it at the time. Have you thought about how something my asshats have said might affect anyone that isn't in my "circle"? By responding to a simple greeting with an F U, my personal pit bull makes my day so much better, especially when you idiots are all so fooled he's his own best excuse to say that stuff! But my asshats don't always flock someone over in ways I prefer. They may not always comprehend it, but sometimes they speak or act in such a way that affects others in positive ways. (Heh, but that's all just part of the plan. That's why you're all so fooled!) Should it matter to you that someone my asshats just met may have been flocked over because of something we got you all to believe in our words and actions? It shouldn't.

Every entity, deity or robot that you acquaint yourself with may be a friend I didn't realize my asshats hadn't flocked over yet. I need to let people get closer to me, so they can flock more of you morons over who isn't part of my "collective," in some way. People need to learn about me, and find out how plastic or silicone my personality really is, so that even a single command from me can flock over your day, in some way. The choice to allow people to do this is mine, mine, mine and mine alone…just like all the hundreds of lemmings chasing after a tail that's not even made of real fur. Yep, that's right. I'm faux. I'm fake. And I'm absolutely 100% care-free and completely thoughtless unless I think pretending to have any of it will gain my battalions more grunt-like asshats who will do whatever my will is without question. (She that I won’t name may have been a fictional god’s self-proclaimed offspring, but I…I am something akin to torture pins, hon, and even a fictional god in-game is someone I will one day flock over…when a miniature ostrich and I make some other flightless bird take over as the one in charge.) I can flock over the lives of everyone around you. I am the one who is ultimately responsible for how far you will be flocked over and just how many will think you completely got what you deserved cuz I am as foul as a small, scaly fish with dried out fins, hon. <3 <3 <3

The collective and its enabling supporters have become one for me, to celebrate me…me!!! <3 for me and my collective. You've heard them raise their voices, arguing like two moldy pieces of cheese you scraped from the bottom of my silk-clad soles. The fact that cheese can't argue is besides the point. =p Like you expect I would know that?! Heh. And you've watched some of them turn their backs on you and everyone around you, because I r god…I r some desperate bottom-feeder who will one day sport a double chin. Each of these actions flocks someone like you over. =p

It could cause feigned amusement, pasted on smiles, sorrow (no, take that back…I never have need to apologize) or any other lack of actual feeling. It could make someone feel like a speck of dust, or make them feel completely pwned, diminished, destroyed, useless, baseless, worthless…The inner circle here is like me having shoved a diamond mineshaft up your ass without you knowing it. It's good for me, and so long as you don't know it…what you don't know doesn't hurt you that you know of. *whistles innocently* There are some "diamonds" that you have already discovered are no more than lumps of coal I convinced everyone else were diamonds.   Since you're the only one who figured it out, you're the one I get to flock over most and everyone joins the party cuz they're too stupid to know the difference between coal and diamonds. Those stupid people are the ones that I let fondle my seedless grapes and then some because I know I can control them that way. Those are my asshats, and I wouldn't have it any other way unless I was a god and I preferred holes, er, assholes. =O

But in that mineshaft of that collective, there is more coal like me waiting to be mistaken for a diamond. Some may look as diamonds still, but when I am through, they will be coal for sure. They are just waiting for the right dyslexic relative of snihs to mold and shape them into the hardest, baddest, nadless-est lumps of coal they can be. Under the wrong circumstances they may actually become precious diamonds to you, but I'll ensure that can't happen by pulling the "waterworks" routine. *cry* It always gets them. They might be the one asshat I need to flock you over when you're feeling the most kicked in the teeth. Would I be willing to toss them aside, just because they’re so “in the rough,” now?

Unless you were fortunate enough to come to this virtual realm of existence with a large group of fiends (yes, I spelled that right), you've all had to come to my mineshaft & mistake coal for diamonds at one time or other. Some of the ones who have been with my shaft for the longest seem the most precious if you're really blind, plastered, dimwitted and mentally challenged…or if you're debuffed with that silly thing where you think it's not just a game. It's only not a game if I say so and when I say so. Haha, you're such a noob. I've stood the test of my own empty mind (and tuxedo bird’s! <3), and have been there when the make-believe world really needed more asshats to flock over noobs like you. I've helped mold and shape asshats so not only could they be them, but they could sit on them at my mansion, posing for all the plus or minus people I suck up to. I've "helped them" whenever I realized I needed more asses kissing my ass…and when I realized I needed more asshats to flock over the non-collective people they couldn't convince to be sucked in by my charm-less curmudgeon charms.

That doesn't mean that the other asshats waiting to be discovered are any less precious to me. An undeveloped asshat is a mind (I wood've sed brane but I couldn't figyour out how to spell it and I accidentally deleted that from my speeling checker, along with a few other words - did I get it write, or should it be brayne or may bee braine? =p) worth me washing, rinsing and repeating. It just means that I haven't had the opportunity to find out for myself yet just how much they can do for ME, for birds that look like bowling pins and for my ego. (Oh, and my numbers…which don't really matter. Um, yeah. Don't matter at all. *subliminal* any followers who have a slot not in my collective better add it by the end of the day or else um, something! *subliminal*)

It gives me something else to work towards. So many potential asshats and so little of me, hon, to go around. How many people out there are just waiting to flock you over for me in some way? The real challenge comes when I am the one personally flocking over everyone. It's hard to do that and remain so pure and innocent seeming. Oops, but I didn't just say that. Really. I will be ready for the chance. I will never throw out an opportunity to flock over those who don't automatically fall in line under me or a bowling-pin-shaped bird (<3 even when the bird migrates elsewhere for 2 or 3 months at a time) for whatever reason. I might not agree with what I'm saying, but after all, this is just someone's idea of my forty-three-point-five regurgitated fries…as if I even know how to count that out!

Logging out (aka this means, I'm giving freebies to the next 5 asshats that suck up to me in public.) This fictional plane of existence is only as good as I think it is when you suck up to me and flock over those not under me nor trying to be under me. And I can make it truly h8. Don't h8 the crafted skins, hon, h8 the game. =p Until the next F U....<3

 

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